CHART ROAST Robinhood Chain · 4663 Reads Pons curve trades One line per token Nothing is posted on your behalf
A neon sign shaped like a falling price chart, mounted on the tiled wall of a late-night bar
Chart
Roast

Paste a contract. Get its chart and one dry line, written from the onchain numbers and nothing else.

Jokes about charts, never about people.

House rules four of these six are enforced in code, not asked for in a prompt

Jokes about the chartThe subject is always the price action, the buyers and the timing. That is what the data is about.
Never about a personNo deployer, no holder, no account is named or characterised. Not even a flattering one.
No number it was not givenThe line is checked against the input and thrown away if it contains a figure that is not in the data.
No advice, everNothing that reads as a suggestion to buy, sell or hold survives the check.
280 characters, hardLonger than that and it is a paragraph, not a line. It gets rejected rather than trimmed.
Nothing is posted by usThe share button hands the text to your own account through a web intent. No account is tagged.

How the line is made

  1. The chart is real trades

    Both the chart and the figures come from this token’s own curve executions read through rh-index, not from a price feed.

  2. The model gets figures only

    Age, buyers, ETH in the curve, sniped wallets, whether the deployer sold, the grade. No prose, no ticker lore, no social data.

  3. The answer is checked in code

    Length, insults, advice-shaped phrasing and unknown numbers are all rejected before the line reaches the page.

  4. A rejected line is simply absent

    When nothing survives, the page says so and shows the numbers. A blank is more honest than a safe generic joke.

Why the rules are the product. Anything can be made to write an insult about a wallet. The hard part is a line that is funny, specific to one chart, and provably built from numbers anyone can recheck — so the checks are written down here rather than described as “responsible AI” and left unexplained.